Saturday, August 10, 2013

What was your ambition?

When we were still in primary school, we were often thrown by this question. Do you remember during the first few days of primary school when you are told to write essays about yourself and your ambition? Come to think of it, it was only the first few days of school but we ought to start planning for the choices we have in life...

This post is not about how wrong/right the education system is or how we are shaped throughout. It is about how far we have come, the journey we have been through and how fast we have changed. Sometimes it might lighten you up, refreshing how that little girl/guy wrote this piece at school, how parents are often curious about what is in our mind and the becoming. Maybe this can motivate you to start striving for your goal? Reviewing back, did you become the person you once wrote about or thought of becoming?

So here is our story!

A page from my portfolio. In college I was with my red converse. It can move! xD

When I was young I was quite close to my brother. Recalling now, this is what I remember. We finished watching Pinocchio and it influenced us on creating things out of wood and all. My brother is an enthusiastic person and I pretty much would follow his footsteps back then. We were talking about creating chairs, in my mind was wooden dolls. Haha so when we were asked to write about what we wanted to be, I remembered one of it I wrote I wanted to be a carpenter. Of course over the years it has changed to some common ones like the teacher (wtf what was I thinking), baker.. And some I would crap just to hand up my homework. It was because growing up I did not see any grown up having a title of 'Carpenter' for their occupation as I grew I guess I grown out of the idea as well.

I was the one who never did her homework wasn't serious about studies. I dropped my biology, fail my chemistry, barely pass my physics (though I ace my additional math). But college was different to me so much so that after 17, things happened all so quickly really. They started to ask "why". They made us firm to be with and made the objective so clear to us, that if you ever wanted to back out now u better back out now. In fact in college was where I had an awesome team to lead with creating events and gatherings for related matter to our career field. So now here in life I am working with a 9- 24/7 job as an interior designer haha and I laugh sometimes because somehow I am not too far from what I thought of becoming when I was 5 or 6. Just I am one where I am designing for my carpenters to start work!

Yi Ru

As for me, I didn't actually had a true ambition when I was young. I think I got the influence of other children, I always wrote I wanted to be a teacher. Perhaps thats the only profession I was most exposed to, so that was the only profession I think would be my first choice when I was a kid. Nothing seem more appealing to me than that...and nope, I am not the kid who aspire to be a doctor since childhood.

Throughout the years when I was in high school, I changed my mind and I opt to be a lawyer. I think my only reason for that was because I like to argue. I always argue in hope that I could win. I guess that's not really a lawyer since they need evidence and facts and intelligence before they could actually argue their way out. Till then I still couldn't see any profession that was appealing to me or that I would solely target on 'thats what I want to be when I grow up'. I just couldn't decide!

When I reach 16, that was the year to choose between Science and Arts stream. I would prefer Science over Arts anytime. Since my dad is already in the water field, I am quite fascinated with Science. There my thought changed to when I grow up, I want to take over my dad's business. So I did have a lot of fluctuating thoughts about my future. would continue on Science stream, and perhaps take some Biomedical or Biochemistry course for my degree because I like Chemistry and Biology more than Physics. I only like quantum physics and astrology which is not very applicable.

It is not until the middle of college where my parents started to bring me to education fairs to choose for uni, and when people there said that with my results I should take something more than Biomed or Biochem such as Pharmacy. Then I remember came this guy who said, with your results, you should take Medicine. That was like a shocking news to me because in my life, I never think and never imagine that I will take medicine and become a doctor in the future. Never was that in my list of choices. NEVER.

Finally for the remaining half a year I was contemplating whether to take Pharmacy, Medicine or Chemical Engineering. Through all the applications to uni, interviews, talking to people in that course/field, reading up a lot about the course/field and A LOT A LOT A LOT of prayers, God showed me the field that I am suppose to and should be.

At this point, at third year, I think I could say I wasn't forced in this course, I actually am interested and I like it, its fascinating, but I have tons of bittersweet moments here. So forgive me if I do complain, cause thats just the typical med student like me, complaining about overload of studies and stress and high expectations. :)


When Yi Ru told me to blog about my used-to-be ambition (since the title is what 'was' your ambition), I was like 'Oh no' because I was an indecisive kid who had thought of every possible ambitions, be it doctor, nurse, lawyer, teacher, police women, pharmacist, nutritionist, forensic, designer or computer science. But, the most exciting ambition I ever had is to be a DETECTIVE! When I was still a  kid, I often watch cartoons and anime that are adventurous and involve investigation. That explains how I got such strong influence :). Do you still remember Inspector Gadget? haha

Above are my some of my favorite detective cartoons and anime. And, I am secretly in love with Conan. haha :

At the age of less than 5, I tend to act like a detective trying to solve cases. So how I did I solve cases, you may wonder? There was once, my grandma's plants were stolen so I went around looking for suspects. Knowing that opposite my house there lives an 'ahpek' who is not well dressed, I instantly told my grandma that I suspect that it is that 'ahpek' since there are plants lying around his small house. So, if you look like a bad person, you will be (in no doubt) my suspect haha. I think the world will be a better place without a detective like me xD. But, there is a psychological theory that explains this (which I had just learned in one of my optional modules in Uni). Kids tend to judge by looking at the surface and not through analyzing the motives of people. For instance, you wanted to paint a card for your mum as a gift but you accidentally spilt the paint. You are a bad girl/boy because you spilt the paint and made a big mess. Nevertheless, my detective dreams still live inside me!

At the age of 10, I actually seriously thought of becoming a detective when I grow up. Thanks to the anime "Detective School Q", I actually tried to search around for a detective school hahahaha. It is until  when I moved to high school that I realized my stupidity. However, I was still watching a lot of investigation drama, so my ambition was somehow switched to forensic investigator but I called it off since I am scared of dead bodies. :/ And then, I wanted to be a nurse, a lawyer, pharmacist, yada yada. At present, I am studying Business Economics and Finance which is like the last choice I would pick as a course. Life is so weird and it swindles sometimes but I am quite clear about what I want to be now. I want to take up languages and perhaps work as a translator. You still see the uncertainties in me with words like 'quite' and 'perhaps', because I felt a missing part in me which I am still exploring. At least, I am exploring with an aim and I am serious about taking up languages. :D


Shits. I can't believe they typed so much. Seems that they have a lot to tell as well haha.

We will never know what will happen in future but making decisions with your heart will never lead you to much regrets in future. You have to know whatever you are going through now is part of your experience. Just like how this question of "What is your ambition?" never really mattered, somehow to me it disappears and it was never really a problem in life. We make decisions as we go, but the goal of it is really being someone you see yourself in future. Never regret of where you are now but be better in future.

So where are you now, looking back where you were first ask of this question.


Haha ;) if you can, you can blog about it and share with us as well! ^_^

Hi felicia!

-Erica here btw hahaha-

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